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Mar. 18th, 2008 10:42 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
worldfromafarWho? Severus Snape and Remus Lupin
What? Remus needs someone to make him come back to reality, and very few people have a knack for it.
When? During the second war. Timeline wise, it would be sometime after OotP and before HBP.
Why? Because this was meant to go up yesterday but wasn't able to. Oh, and because at that point in time Remus needed someone to desperately snap him out of the daze he was in.
Author's notes: Dedicated to Sev!mun 'cause she's just awesome like that. Belated Birthday present, sort of. ;) I hope this at least sort of fits with what you had in mind. <33
As Severus let himself in the Headmaster's office after not receiving an answer once he had knocked, he half expected Dumbledore to be studying a pensieve or simply to be too distracted to hear the knock. It wouldn't surprise him, considering that this had already happened once or twice just in the past few weeks. However, the one who stood upon his arrival was a weary looking Remus Lupin. One that looked as if he had been woken up by his entrance.
"Dumbledore had to step out for a moment," Remus provided before Severus could speak, his voice hoarse. Clearing his throat, he rubbed the side of his neck as he tried to hide how flushed his face was because he had fallen asleep in the Headmaster's office.
Severus didn't nod or made any other sign to show that he had acknowledged the remark. His eyes just bore into Remus', feeling something inside him recoil at the obvious weakness in the other man's appearance. That heaviness of his body, the lack of life in his eyes. It all made him feel as if the mark was burning, and for a moment he looked away in order to make it stop.
Any other day Remus would either try some polite conversation, or he would feel cornered if it was close to the full moon. Instead he felt nothing. Just that emptiness that he couldn't shake off no matter how hard he kept trying. "...I can let Dumbledore know you came by," Remus offered since the silence only kept expanding.
Raising an eyebrow, Severus turned back to him. "And what are you here for, exactly?"
"My guess is something similar as to why you are here."
Biting back the remark that he highly doubted that, he merely looked him over once more. "...what's the matter with you, mutt," Severus drawled, "feeling lost without your keeper?"
An odd sort of quirk twisted Remus' lips, but there was no humor in him. "I was starting to wonder when that remark would surface."
"Then good thing I didn't disappoint, hm?"
But Remus didn't answer. Now it was his turn to stare at him, his jaw clenching. The past few weeks, after that battle at the Ministry, things had been turbulent to say the last and Remus had been feeling completely lost in it. Once, years ago, he had figured that he had found a way to ignore the loneliness and emptiness that would take a hold of him, but now it all felt painfully new. It kept ripping him apart from the inside out, and simply functioning felt...odd. Wrong, even. Sirius was gone, and he wasn't coming back. Years ago, not so far away from where he was standing, seeing his best friend again had returned a sense of self that he had lost over a decade ago but now it was gone again. Sirius had taken it with him, because he held a big key as to who he was, and having to function without it - and without him - was something he wasn't used to anymore. Remus hadn't disappeared how he had done last time, but that necessity to do so was there nonetheless. A part of him actually believed that maybe he hadn't disappeared physically, but in every other way he was long gone.
And Severus could see that. No matter how much Remus tried to hide it and fool others by continuing his life as he normally would, Severus was a master at picking people apart. The little details some took for granted were the first things he noticed, and no matter how good Remus believed he was at pretending, Severus could tell. He could see him coming apart.
He didn't show compassion like others would, however. He didn't show him kindness and understanding, because even if he could relate to dealing with loss there were other matters to tend to first.
"...you shouldn't be here." Severus' tone was matter-of-factly, dismissive. "In fact, you may go now. I'll tell Dumbledore you had to leave. Whatever it is he called you for, I'm sure he can find someone who is better suited."
"Thank you," Remus answered, his own tone turning a bit colder, "but that is not necessary." A beat. "I'm fine."
"I didn't ask if you were."
The muscle in his jaw twitched as Remus stared at him, and after a second he had to look away. As much as he hated it, a part of him was actually tempted to take him up on the offer. To just leave once and for all, because he himself knew that Dumbledore needed someone in the Order who would be focused and who could be willing to do whatever he needed him to do. Right now Remus just felt like he was barely existing, so how much help could he really be?
Just as he thought this, however, something caught his eye. The Sorting Hat rested on a stool and, as he looked at it, Remus couldn't help but think - again - just how wrong it had been the day of his sorting. He shouldn't have been a Gryffindor. He was proving that, yet again. Peter shouldn't have been a Gryffindor either; didn't that show the mistakes that it could make? Sirius and James had fit right in, but...
"...leave, Lupin," Severus said, turning to walk towards the door, jolting Remus back to the present. "He's not here anymore and you still let him drag you down? It's pathetic."
Severus didn't have to say who the 'he' was for Remus to know. He also didn't have to clarify who he was talking about, because just saying that managed to make Remus feel something other than that emptiness he held inside him. Anger? Resentment, because of what Severus had been? The mixture of just everything started brewing, and clenching his jaw again Remus had to keep himself from the sudden urge to reach for his wand and hex Severus across the room. Heh, that was certainly improvement from the apathy, he thought bitterly to himself.
Turning to look at him one last time before reaching for the door knob, Severus caught that change in him but he didn't show it. "Well?" he asked impatiently instead. "Aren't you leaving?"
Remus' eyes barely darted towards the door before they met Severus' once more. "Like I said," he responded quietly but steadily this time, "I will tell Dumbledore you came by once he returns."
Rather than saying anything, Severus barely raised an eyebrow in the slightest before making his way out. Those bloody lions, he thought as he descended the stairs, sometimes he really wondered how in the hell they could get through wars the way they did.
What? Remus needs someone to make him come back to reality, and very few people have a knack for it.
When? During the second war. Timeline wise, it would be sometime after OotP and before HBP.
Why? Because this was meant to go up yesterday but wasn't able to. Oh, and because at that point in time Remus needed someone to desperately snap him out of the daze he was in.
Author's notes: Dedicated to Sev!mun 'cause she's just awesome like that. Belated Birthday present, sort of. ;) I hope this at least sort of fits with what you had in mind. <33
As Severus let himself in the Headmaster's office after not receiving an answer once he had knocked, he half expected Dumbledore to be studying a pensieve or simply to be too distracted to hear the knock. It wouldn't surprise him, considering that this had already happened once or twice just in the past few weeks. However, the one who stood upon his arrival was a weary looking Remus Lupin. One that looked as if he had been woken up by his entrance.
"Dumbledore had to step out for a moment," Remus provided before Severus could speak, his voice hoarse. Clearing his throat, he rubbed the side of his neck as he tried to hide how flushed his face was because he had fallen asleep in the Headmaster's office.
Severus didn't nod or made any other sign to show that he had acknowledged the remark. His eyes just bore into Remus', feeling something inside him recoil at the obvious weakness in the other man's appearance. That heaviness of his body, the lack of life in his eyes. It all made him feel as if the mark was burning, and for a moment he looked away in order to make it stop.
Any other day Remus would either try some polite conversation, or he would feel cornered if it was close to the full moon. Instead he felt nothing. Just that emptiness that he couldn't shake off no matter how hard he kept trying. "...I can let Dumbledore know you came by," Remus offered since the silence only kept expanding.
Raising an eyebrow, Severus turned back to him. "And what are you here for, exactly?"
"My guess is something similar as to why you are here."
Biting back the remark that he highly doubted that, he merely looked him over once more. "...what's the matter with you, mutt," Severus drawled, "feeling lost without your keeper?"
An odd sort of quirk twisted Remus' lips, but there was no humor in him. "I was starting to wonder when that remark would surface."
"Then good thing I didn't disappoint, hm?"
But Remus didn't answer. Now it was his turn to stare at him, his jaw clenching. The past few weeks, after that battle at the Ministry, things had been turbulent to say the last and Remus had been feeling completely lost in it. Once, years ago, he had figured that he had found a way to ignore the loneliness and emptiness that would take a hold of him, but now it all felt painfully new. It kept ripping him apart from the inside out, and simply functioning felt...odd. Wrong, even. Sirius was gone, and he wasn't coming back. Years ago, not so far away from where he was standing, seeing his best friend again had returned a sense of self that he had lost over a decade ago but now it was gone again. Sirius had taken it with him, because he held a big key as to who he was, and having to function without it - and without him - was something he wasn't used to anymore. Remus hadn't disappeared how he had done last time, but that necessity to do so was there nonetheless. A part of him actually believed that maybe he hadn't disappeared physically, but in every other way he was long gone.
And Severus could see that. No matter how much Remus tried to hide it and fool others by continuing his life as he normally would, Severus was a master at picking people apart. The little details some took for granted were the first things he noticed, and no matter how good Remus believed he was at pretending, Severus could tell. He could see him coming apart.
He didn't show compassion like others would, however. He didn't show him kindness and understanding, because even if he could relate to dealing with loss there were other matters to tend to first.
"...you shouldn't be here." Severus' tone was matter-of-factly, dismissive. "In fact, you may go now. I'll tell Dumbledore you had to leave. Whatever it is he called you for, I'm sure he can find someone who is better suited."
"Thank you," Remus answered, his own tone turning a bit colder, "but that is not necessary." A beat. "I'm fine."
"I didn't ask if you were."
The muscle in his jaw twitched as Remus stared at him, and after a second he had to look away. As much as he hated it, a part of him was actually tempted to take him up on the offer. To just leave once and for all, because he himself knew that Dumbledore needed someone in the Order who would be focused and who could be willing to do whatever he needed him to do. Right now Remus just felt like he was barely existing, so how much help could he really be?
Just as he thought this, however, something caught his eye. The Sorting Hat rested on a stool and, as he looked at it, Remus couldn't help but think - again - just how wrong it had been the day of his sorting. He shouldn't have been a Gryffindor. He was proving that, yet again. Peter shouldn't have been a Gryffindor either; didn't that show the mistakes that it could make? Sirius and James had fit right in, but...
"...leave, Lupin," Severus said, turning to walk towards the door, jolting Remus back to the present. "He's not here anymore and you still let him drag you down? It's pathetic."
Severus didn't have to say who the 'he' was for Remus to know. He also didn't have to clarify who he was talking about, because just saying that managed to make Remus feel something other than that emptiness he held inside him. Anger? Resentment, because of what Severus had been? The mixture of just everything started brewing, and clenching his jaw again Remus had to keep himself from the sudden urge to reach for his wand and hex Severus across the room. Heh, that was certainly improvement from the apathy, he thought bitterly to himself.
Turning to look at him one last time before reaching for the door knob, Severus caught that change in him but he didn't show it. "Well?" he asked impatiently instead. "Aren't you leaving?"
Remus' eyes barely darted towards the door before they met Severus' once more. "Like I said," he responded quietly but steadily this time, "I will tell Dumbledore you came by once he returns."
Rather than saying anything, Severus barely raised an eyebrow in the slightest before making his way out. Those bloody lions, he thought as he descended the stairs, sometimes he really wondered how in the hell they could get through wars the way they did.
